I've had the idea of a "hero" tumbling around in my head recently....
That particular concept has come up in conversation several times in the last few weeks. Each time, the context has been a little different but ultimately the overall meaning is the same.
In general, sometimes a hero is an ordinary person faced with an extraordinary circumstance. Despite the odds being stacked against him or her, the hero typically prevails in the end.
And sometimes a hero is the "knight in shining armor"... the person who sweeps you off your feet and protects you for the rest of your life. They are the person who is there for you no matter what the circumstance, supporting you and seeing you threw whatever life has to show you. All done while smiling and assuring you that the future will be grand and golden.
Overall, we live in a world where heroes sometimes take a prominent role in life. People are fascinated by heroes. Just watch the daily news or open the paper… people are considered heroes all time when they overcome remarkable situations. People want — OR NEED — heroes in their lives.
Heroes are something to believe in…. someone to count on.
Though out my life, there have been a few people that I've considered to be a hero… my dad, my former boss, a former lover.
I believe that when you're facing the world alone, life can be a very long lonely road. When your hero finally comes along and takes your hand, the emptiness inside disappears. Old fears and insecurities get cast aside, and it seems that you can survive anything. Your hero is in your corner caring for you when no one else is there; offering support and encouragement. Your hero waits for you, no matter how long it takes.
Sadly, at one point or another, I've been disappointed by my hero's. I've been let down. I've been disillusioned, discouraged, and disenchanted. Aren't heroes supposed to be perfect?
Sometimes I need to remember that heroes make mistakes too. Idealistic isn't always reality. They can't always make everything better. They are human and fallible, too. It's a tough lesson to learn, though.
Personally, it shook me to the core when I realized that my concept of "perfect" really isn't really perfect at all. It's flawed. It's unrealistic. It's even romantic. But it is not perfect.
But, it IS okay.
With that thought in mind, I wonder if I am somebody's hero too. Have I touched someone's life the way a few have touched mine? It saddens me to think that at some point, I may have let them down and shattered the illusion for them. Was I ever the reason that someone wondered why there hero let them down?
But, maybe that's it…
Just maybe the realization that we all make mistakes and have the capacity to grow from them IS the "extraordinary circumstance" that we all face. Maybe it's that which makes each and every one of us an every day hero?
Can it be that the true hero is actually inside each one of us? Is it how we handle the ordeals of life that make us remarkable?
Life isn't easy. Aren't those who are able to fight and overcome the challenges of everyday life are the true heroes. The people that can listen to others and make it work… and learn from their life. That is a hero.
That idea makes me feel better… I am a hero. AND, I am surrounded by good people that are heroes, too.
Although, maybe it's the romantic in me that still likes the idea that there is one special hero out there who will gallop in to rescue me. It can't hurt to think that just maybe my knight in shining armor will arrive someday.
Well, who knows? It could happen!
Will you be my hero? Can I be YOUR hero?
6 hours ago
1 comment:
I had a hero long before my current hero. He was everything I wanted out of my partner for life. I had no desire to find another person. Did I always treat him well? I thought that I did. I told him that I loved him as many times in one day as the thought popped into my mind, and even when it didn't. And I meant it every time.
After trying to adjust my life to my hero, my hero had other ideas, since he spent more time talking with "friends" about things in his life than he did with me, the one person would was able to help him the most. And in Buffalo's gay "community", asking "friends" about whether you should end your relationship is like asking your dog if he'd like to have another treat.
My hero turned out to be someone who is always looking for something better, and that first something better led to the end of my relationship with him, even after weeks of begging.
The hurt never goes away, but it does get put onto the back burner after a while, especially when a new hero arrives. My new hero is my real hero, and that hasn't changed from day one.
And the old hero? The old hero couldn't live with the first something better without trying to find another something better. And after breaking another something better's heart, he had to settle for keeping the first something better and being disappointed again. But the something better itch never goes away. And with each new conquest and each new disappointment, his expectations grow higher. I can only feel sorry for my first hero, because he'll never be happy.
But the best part is that it took one hero and the worst heartbreak of my life to find my true hero.
And I hope that you can find yours as well. And I know that you will, because someone who is searching for a hero will always be more appreciative of that hero when they find it than someone is searching for something better.
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